A PUBLIC TAI ANNOUNCEMENT SHIPPING ALERT
by GoggleMaster01
Summary: Tai wants to talk about shippings... Lots of pairings are bashed, including Taito and Michi. Supports Taiora- sort of. Also states a very true fact about the Romance genre- IT'S EVERYWHERE ON THIS SITE! ROMANCE FANFICTION WON'T DIE! Rated T to be safe.


GoggleMaster01- I am a terrible updater, and to make it up to my readers, here's a short one shot about Tai and pairings. Tai has something to say to the shippers of the world. Some actual fics are mentioned in here. If you see one, the author of that fic has full credit for their fic. No fics or authors will be named. Oh yea- I DON'T OWN DIGIMON!!!

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Hi, people, my name is Tai Kamiya. Y'know, the kid with the big hair who loves soccer that you like to ship with every character imaginable. Well, I'd like to ask several things of you.

First of all, cool down with the Romance genre fics. I mean, seriously, every other fic is Romance! Once, against Izzy, Matt and Sora's warnings, I went on to look up some fanfics. I heard from Davis that some of them were pretty funny, so I went to check it out. Well, the first batch of fics were all Romance, so I narrowed it down to just the Humor fanfiction. EVERY SINGLE FIC- Romance/Humor, Romance/Humor, Romance/Humor. EVERY DAMN FIC WAS PART ROMANCE! This has more than likely happened to you too. Even when you choose a different genre to try and get rid of those godforsaken Romance fics, you'll get fics that are two genres- the one you picked and ROMANCE!!! So please, Fanfiction has enough Romance fanfiction. Please slow down a bit. I'm not saying stop completely, I'm saying stop writing it so damn much that every other fic is Romance.

Second of all, stop pairing me up with Matt. I mean, come on, people, it's a KID'S SHOW! I don't love the guy! His hair is so spiky that he could impale me with it, not to mention the fact that he hates every idea I have. The minute someone udders the word "Taito", I scream. And no, Matt certainly does not love me! And please, stop using the scene in _Crest of Friendship_ when I was hurt as an excuse. Piedmon hit me with giant rocks- I thought I was gonna die. Then, Matt came and saved me, and his Digimon revived WarGreymon. So, I'm grateful he came for me, but I'm not gonna start smooching him or doing even less appropriate things with him because of that. So, that's not a good excuse. Next!

I see Michi and I puke. Have you guys paid any attention to _Princess Karaoke_? Did you see how Mimi treated those Gekomon? That's probably how she'd treat her boyfriend/husband! I don't feel like waiting on her hand and foot all the time. There'd have to be a million of me to carry out all her demands. And, I heard from a Gekomon that she likes a weekly foot massage. Tai Kamiya does not massage feet!

Now, onto Taiora. Okay, I admit I have a little crush on Sora, and a sequel to GM01's A New Life will feature sprinkles of Taiora here and there. But, just like that fic will not be consumed by me and Sora muttering mushy phrases to each other, I am not loopy over Sora. I do not have pictures of her under my pillow. I do not daydream about her when I'm bored. I will not go to modeling school, for her or ANYONE! (Yes, this was actually in someone's fanfiction.) I'll admit my heart was broken when she gave Matt those cookies, but half of that was cookie lust. But, I did not become so heartbroken that I became depressed and try to win her back. I did not become so sad that I felt like throwing myself from Tokyo Tower. That was 75% loss of some good chocolate chip cookies.

Don't ship me with Davis. I know we look alike and act alike and both play soccer, but still, that's a little extreme for a show rated TV-Y7. Same for Joe or Izzy, who seem to be semi-popular too. They're my good friends, but I don't love them. And please, don't ship me with a Digimon! Yes, I have been shipped with Digimon, from Agumon to Gatomon. But, it could be worse. Kari's been shipped with Piedmon. Now if that's not freaky, I don't know what freaky is.

Also, I'm not a lonely bachelor who exists to fall in love in people's fanfiction and then have his heart broken and commit suicide or something. That seems to be something you shippers think I am. I'm Tai, okay? I'm not the kind of guy who sets out looking for love unless it's something tasty that is my heart's desire. Food is Number One in my heart, forever and always. I have a life, okay? I have soccer and being a DigiDestined (not as easy as it looks). And, there's always the loveable daily ritual of tripping over myself and banging into the sink and screaming in pain in the morning trying to fix my hair (don't try all that stuff at home- it hurts). The last thing on my mind is looking for love.

So, there you go. That's what I think about shippings. Please, stop shipping me with other characters and leave me alone. *takes a nap*

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GoggleMaster01- Well, there you go. Tai's opinion on shippings. What do you think? I think I might have more PTAs. (Public Tai Announcements) This one was fun to write! Please review on the way out.


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